A New Year of New Mondays

Today was our first “Mommy and Lil Bit day” of the new year.

You know how on very rare days you manage to stretch out the minutes and fit everything in that you intended to accomplish into those precious hours? Somehow I managed to do that today and if this is any indication of how the new year will go I am looking forward to living it up. I have about 12 hours or so one day a week to try to pack in as much mommy time as possible and it is a lot of pressure especially if Lil Bit is having a bad day.

I have found in this brief but enlightening journey as a mom of a now 3 year old, that I have set up my idea of being a good mom in such a way that I will never know a guilt-free moment. Now this guilty train of thought is not necessarily in a mindful way, but almost completely subconscious, likely based on my nursing/medical background, pinterest, mothering books and my OWN mother–all of these things adding pressure and driving my already overachieving brain to be the best sort of mom. So much so that I sometimes catch myself being a crappy mom in the process….

Not going to lie, I totally googled “working mom guilt” and after flipping through a few articles I found this. The article is from a few years ago but it feels all to fitting, however she herself seems unable to offer a solution to the problem.

Looking back at my beginnings as a mother, I set my alarm when my infant slept through the night so that I could make sure there was (barely) enough pumped breastmilk to get her through the next night I worked (12 hr night-shifts wreak havoc on your prolactin levels) and cried when I spilled a 2oz bottle the first week I went back to work after pumping–in the breakroom because we did not have a lactation room. I probably would have made more milk and been a better, kinder full-time working, graduate-school-attending mom if I had gotten a good night’s rest instead. I get so preoccupied with how things are supposed to be, trying to find decent prices/coupons on organic food or meal-prepping for the week so that we can eat “cleaner” that I miss an opportunity to play with my child or teach her something new. I KNOW in my heart that it is better to be one-on-one with her and to give her a kind, caring, mother rather than a completely organic and balanced diet and every Barbie for her bless-ed dream house but my head tells me these are things that matter.

After today, where I actually spent the majority of the day WITH my daughter and not just in the same household as her, I remember why I went down to a 4 day work week and I think that this may be why the whole household has been more balanced today. Today also gives me pause and makes me consider an underlying, additional New Years Resolution…to be a mom to the best of my REALISTIC abilities rather than those that I have superimposed on myself. Wish me luck!

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Happy New Year/The 2014 Wrap Up

Every year has it’s ups and downs and while overall 2014 was a fairly good year I’m hoping for my family, and yours of course, that 2015 will be very good to everyone.

So far at the start of 2015 I have 5 pregnant friends, some with their first, others with their 3rd. I’ve already started knitting again to be able to send off baby blankets to the newbie parents and instead of donating some of Little Bit’s baby toys, I’ve set them aside in case some of them have girls.

Work seems to be going okay; I’ve always loved what I actually do but I’m not a fan of office politics and sometimes they make going into work difficult.

Little Bit is growing like a weed. Santa was exceptionally good to her and the Moose and I had to rearrange her room to fit the gigantic Barbie Dreamhouse in there. I think it’s hilarious that she’s also playing with my late1980s/early90s Barbie Camper and some actually Barbies (which are made of significantly higher quality than the newer ones and this bums me out as a mom). Also the old clothing is still in good shape and is also mainly cotton vs nylon hoochie disasters from Target.

The Moose is continuing his mission of fitness and wants 20 inch arms by July. He ended the new year with 18 1/2 inches. All looks the same to me….I am still on/off my fitness plan. I think the universe wishes me to remain short and fluffy as every time I get into a good routine I end up with bronchitis or injury some body part. I’m currently confined to yoga and upper body as I literally tore the medial aspect of my calf muscle playing tennis. Fan-damn-tastic right? Especially in the middle of the holidays where goodies are everywhere. I’ll get back on track though–my mother-in-law and sister-in-law want me to do a Disney Princess 1/2 marathon with them in 2016 so I’ll have to be able to jog/run part of the way to get to take pics with the characters.

Our family and my personal New Year’s Resolutions consist of the following: paying off some debts, saving money for our Eurotrip, and being happy!

I leave you with the pic of Little Bit picking oranges at her Aunt’s house…she ate nine, NINE! oranges on this particular day. 🙂

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